idiocyncracy

sometimes... you dun noe.. if you make the right decisions or not..
sometimes people act irrationally due to pressure..when there is pressure or a dateline.. your mind gets clouded and you cant tink rationally.. and perhaps when it is all over.. suddenly you realise it may not be the right choice.. at the moment ...it seemed like such a good idea.somehow..im not satisfied with myself for the way i handled certain issues... i guess what i need to do from now on is to first learn how to handle my emotions and be patient with myself.. so when there is a crisis.. i will not go thru twice as many emotional hurdles...
its hard living with regrets..
but one must to forgive oneself :)

now that the problem is solved.. my mind is clear and im glad.. i tink ive grown much wiser. and im glad for the people ard me. one must never be to easy and trust too easily.

did i mention that schindler's list is a good movie? made me cry buckets as well and inspiring enuff to make me wanna leave a legacy...

went out for ktv yesterday... good to see that bunch..

and yet again.. we were reminded again and again to stop singing haha..

jap food that din taste like jap food but it was tasty and reaaallie cheap..

i learnt a whole new lot of chinese songs ... haha


on the way home with zheyan..

we broached on the topic of love and letting go.. one of the universal issues that woman and man all over the world pondered and continue to ponder about, analysed, and felt.


he said he does not understand women ... how its so hard to woo a girl and giving her what she wants without him asking..

well.. there is no right or wrong when it comes to wooing someone you fancy i guess.. for every one is different.. some girls like plenty of attention.. some are repulsed by it and some just.. well.. wanna have fun! haha

its very rare that both parties fall in love with each other at the same time..

there is always an imbalance.. but the balance of the scales can also shift ..at the start and during the relationship...

whether there are results or not.. i guess the most important thing is that you have tried your best ..that's what matters.. so you dun look back with regrets...


:)

fast and furious...



*******

went ard suntec to look at royce chocolates as a bday present for a fren..

met up with old fren Dominic..

we went to look at the chocs...walked quite alot due to roadblocks for imf.. we had to circle ard the whole place quite a number of times b4 we reach suntec.. how annoying...


went to play pool..

fun sia.. haha
new addiction..
i have never noen pool to be this fun.. :)

and you called.

it feels good to hear from you.


sunday..

i dun want these moments to end..

and now im listening to ryan cabrera song.. and im missing you..

***********


today i caught up with eugene..

hes still as humourous as ever..

food republic..

i bought 2 items..
one pretty shirt dress from forever 21 and a top from topshop *sounds tacky) haha


hm...retail is therapy!

i went home feeling better.. :)

the things we talked about.. the things you tell me about.. so good.. i wud like to record the conversations.. lol

such parallels we are.

i wish it can last forever.

known you for one week only..

but 2 times- 6 hour talks.

farm.sheep. dogs. 4 horses.2 black 2 white. work hard for a moment then relaz in another country. travel ard the world. stewarding. dogs-husky, terrier. lions.we. brazilboy with iceland roots and jap model with european house. zoo. coffee. tennis. plop ping plop. ''i like talking to you''. websites of marine fish. beautiful starfish.set up ur own business. ginger dessert. migration.ur dog. ur contentment. ur enjoyment of fruits of labour. ur house. ur english teacher. ur prank on chinese calligraphy teacher.fu.draw architecture and surroundings and nature. counterstrike and basketball. my ij fiesta. ur songs-photo and poeme. ur nephew ''hello hello'' .chocolate to him. ur morning nourishment- inspiring talkers. neurolinguistic programming. gay fren gay confession. middle child syndrome. modeling and not taking jean paul gaultier stuffs. make-up in front of press audience then crowds. catwalk 250. catwalk teaching and how one guy walk like he's shopping in orchard road. ''how can one be so skinny!''. ur patience when i state my point. dun wanna die with regrets.to spend quality time with the ppl who meant to you the most. for you only have that much energy. we will live till 80 due to technology. strawberry fondue, lychee martini. dun drink. dun smoke. tennistennis. ur new song. fast is hope. slow is sad. disasters and hide under table.earthquake. carry parachute.. we float down and say hi. you and i both. you and i like to say i like to trynew things. insurance. or stewarding. ur aunt. your dad and tough periods. 60 dollar bag that looks good. 100000 a month.some cities are nice,kl is chaotic. travelling-denmark, england. butchers earn more than accountants. tell realghost stories. bday once at sentosa. wana meet ghost. cycle past jap cemetary. sister in england. younger sis st nicks hc overseas.middle child and independence. breakfast after cycling. wanna go trip. amzing other fren who is nus student, wife, son, childcare centre, build rapport. are humans freak of nature. why are we so advanced in development when there is no cause for it. me not toking sense. electromagnetic impressions made by men in sites with violent histories. english expert.love english. waste of youth. i understand what you say. spontaneity. middle class getting poorer. humans are batteries. recharge and rechargeable and charger. animation want. im good at analogies. i reply in 5 hours. can run to your house. walk to serangoon gardens. you are brave. when youre sad.. listen to sad songs and cry it all out so i feel better and i dun keep it inside. jack of all trades master of none. jump from jetty 10 m high. bungee jumping. plans to wakeboard and basic diving. scared of being in love with power and money. surround yourself with the ppl of the same mindset. ''im surprised you understand what i say''. i think you think more than me. ''very good very good'' humans are so abdominable that even ghosts are nothing-harmless. we both say ''fear of the unknown'' smart girl. ure brave. snow white lions. kfc infront of lions and licking lips. what you doing in sept 11. steve irwin. to leave behind an impression and mark. to be remembered favourably.try everything,when your old, you only remembered the things that you never tried than the things you you failed in after trying, live a life of no regrets. foriegn friends. ure agnostic. you sang ktv and ''its my life, ''.my art in japan. my sesame street and your samurai .

***********

last tuesday. i went to chill in tcc in raffles place with shuling. very cold....haha.. and cute waitress.. nice potato wedges with lotsa cheese. oreo mocha.

later on we head on to nydc to satisfy our craving for cheesecake. i ate solid gold.. the thick cheesecake and we tokked..

nearby us.. 2 girls shared a salad.. i compared her choice of food and my choice of food. hm.. il be miserable with the salad.
haha

one of the girls looked real scary. she had nice features but eyes too huge for her face and they look slightly out of place and abit too much out. and she seems bitcy. when shuling was toking about how she cannot slim down no matter what, the girl looked over and had a nasty looking smile on her face. see this is what salad does to you! you become starved and pinched and you dun get contented because you lack nourishment of happy foods like cheese and chocolate. haha i call them happy foods because they make you happy when you eat them.
lol


she confessed to me about her liking for this guy who did not fit in her criteria at all. strange eh? how love works.

i mean sometimes.. the ones you end up with is totally different from your preferences. and you wonder how it is that you fell in love with him. its unexplainable. and that's why we call it love.

how we all pin after the ones we cant have. we ponder about the ones who fancy us.

when you love someone. suddenly your world revolves ard him and everything else does not matter anymore. how everything about him is curiously interesting. all the things he likes.. no matter how absurd you will tink it is cute. its endless fun with that person and you just wanna noe more and more abt the person..its wonderful discovery.


***************************

last wednesday dinner with my jc
classmates was good. VERY GOOD food. yummiest steam boat buffet. im definitely going back there. :)

****

im craving for zouk.

this is the song you sent to me..

and i wud like to particularly highlight this 3 lines.


you were my life
you were my faith
you gave me hope everyday.


cancel away the ''were'' and ''gave'' and replace it with ''are'' and ''give''.
:)

My goal tomorrow: memorise every single thing the seniors say tomorrow. Observe with coolness. Serve with coolness.
Kick their asses.

i fucking hate my work.

actually i still have one more thing i wanna do.

work very very short term in zouk..lol.

list of goals i wanna achieve this year..

1)do social work.. i wanna help kids and troubled teenagers.

2)excel in studies. i wanna see how well i can do.. all my life ive always been putting at most, 50% effort.. lets see what i can achieve with 80% effort..(i did not put 100% because it is impossible that you put in 100 % effort for studying..we are all human arent we? )

3)go on more foodie trips

4) save enuff money to go on short trips

5) re-learn tennis

6)learn to eat mushrooms.


list of things i wanna do this year

1)im back into the clubbing scene! slack off it for a while cuz i was too tired and feelin too old.. but after last friday.. the dancing devil in me is surfacing again..i get a rush when i groove! i still havent check out attica!

2) explore famous chill-out places... (wala wala? )

3) finish up seinfeld

4)try out various wines..

5)learn how to make cheesecakes and black forest cakes.. (okay, i noe im kinda late.. )

6) swim once a week at least (now that ive got more time in my hands)

7) arthouse films


hm.. my list of wanna-dos is more than my must-dos..
i seem to take leisure more seriously than work..
*sheepish grin*

and there goes ocbc..

i finished my time at ocbc on the 30th.
had a bang of a time b4 i went for there were some silly office antics..


it was bittersweet..
i dislike working but im gonna miss everything else there...

miss the vibrant coloured office... i seriously doubt im ever gonna see any office as beautifully decorated as this one..

miss the habit of grumbling about asinine customers

miss the camaderie of my colleagues

miss the food ard raffles place (the ridiculously cheap golden shoe food center and its tissue prata, china square fish dumpling noodles, deliciously clad TCC, curry chicken noodles with addictive gravy at banquet in arcade shoppin center, chicken rice at maxwell, prawn noodles along the route to far east square, hong lim char kway teow, fishermans wharf, famous beef noodles along chulia street, thai chilli restaurant..

miss the quiet sundays where we will all talk abt random stuff and laugh at all the silly things

miss doing silly stuff like stealing ben and jerry's from the fridge and playing pranks on eric

miss poking fun at peeps




***************************


its been rather overwhelming for me recently

had an ongoing freelance project going on..
was very sick a couple of days back..
along with work..
outings..
as well as being a ''counselor''

thought i was gona be overstretched..

but i must say i gotta be thankful cuz life has been smooth sailing recently

i passed my exams! yay...! i really thought il fail all and indeed i still marvel at how i manage to pass..

***********

yesterday was pei's bday..

went to wine network in dempsey road for a cosy celebration..
everyone beautifully dressed, good food, good wine, fun company and the wine was enuff to make you high..german sausage yum!


had pei dunk alot of the delicious wine.. and she was entertaining :P
along with bianca the party babe

and the rest of us the fruit gang lol

with half a striptease by 2 guys.. .. hilarious and dumb

pei and her crazy utterings and pretty red dress

happy birthday pei!

zouk after that

zouk is still the best..
great crowd, great music.. (friday night-sigh!)
save for a few idiots..

dance the night away

retreat at four..

good it was good.